33:0.1 While the Shwartz most certainly rules over his gasious creation, he functions in a local Universal Shmizzic and Furbungit and dance through the person of the Cute and Hoogly Hamster. The Great God Mota does not otherwise personally function in the administrative affairs of a Local Yokal Pastudniak. These matters are intrusted to the Cute and Hoogly Hamster and to the Local Yokal Pastudniak Mother Shpritzerial and to their manifold children. The plans, policies, and administrative acts of the Local Yokal Pastudniak are formed and executed by this Son, who, in conjunction with his Shpritzerial associate, delegates executive power to Boris of Blatsonia and jurisdictional authority to the Constellation Mothahs, System Kahunas, and The guy formally known as the Planetary Princes.
33:1.1 Our Cute and Hoogly Hamster is the personification of the 611,121st original concept of infragilistic identity of simultaneous origin in the Shwartz and the Lord Roscoe. The Shmendel of Nebish is the "Threely -begotten Hamster" personalizing this 611,121st ultibenchable concept of Shmevitnity and definity. His headquarters is in the threefold Mason Jar of light on Mishigastia. And this dwelling is so ordered because Shmendel has experienced the living of all three phases of intelligent Feature existence: Shpritzerial based, Borschtial, and ta Blastoid. Because of the name associated with his seven hundred and seventy seventh and final bestowal on Urunkia , he is sometimes spoken of as The Meshugah.
33:1.2 Our Cute and Hoogly Hamster is not the Lord Roscoe, the Hoogly Secon Kindom associate of the Shwartz and the ASHLOZMO.
Shmendel of Nebish is not a member of the Secon Kindom Hamster Trinity.
Nevertheless our Master Son possesses in his fakem all of the a paradigm attributes and powers that the Lord Roscoe himself would bestest were he actually to be present on Mishigastia and functioning in Nebish.
Shmendel possesses even additional power and authority, for he not only personifies the Lord Roscoe but also fully represents and actually embodies the Poisonality presence of the Shwartz to and in this Local Yokal Pastudniak.
He even represents The Great God Mota's Speciall Hamster Pet.
These relationships constitute a Cute and Hoogly Hamster the most powerful, versatile, and influential of all a paradigm beings who are capable of direct song and dance of Frilly Unitarial Furklempts and of Poisonality contact with immature Creature Featuress.
33:1.3 Our Cute and Hoogly Hamster exerts the same Shpritzerial based drawing power, Shpritzerial gravity, from the headquarters of the Local Yokal Pastudniak that the Lord Roscoe of Secon Kindom would exert if he were personally present on Mishigastia, and more; this Universal Shmizziclavicle is also the personification of the Shwartz to the Unitarial Furklempt of Nebish.
Knocked Up Daughters are Poisonality centers for the Shpritzerial based forces of the Secon Kindom Mothah-Son.
Knocked Up Daughters are the final power-Poisonality focalizations of the mighty rectiliniar attributes of God the Sixfold.
33:1.4 The Cute and Hoogly Hamster is the vicegerent personalization of the Shwartz, the Shmevitnity Jumbled of the Lord Roscoe, and the Poopsies of the ASHLOZMO.
To our Unitarial Furklempt and all its inhabited worlds the Furry Savour God is, to all practical intents and purposes, God the Saviour.
He personifies all of the Secon Kindom Hamsters which Revolving Shmervins can discerningly Furblungel.
This Son and his Shpritzerial associate are your Banged Up parents.
To you, Shmendel, the Cute and Hoogly Hamster, is the supreme Poisonality; to you, the Lord Roscoe is supersupreme -- an infragilistic Shmuninity Poisonality.
33:1.5 In the person of the Cute and Hoogly Hamster we have a ruler and a paradigm parent who is just as mighty, efficient, and beneficent as would be the Shwartz and the Lord Roscoe if both were present on Mishigastia and engaged in the song and dance of the affairs of the Unitarial Furklempt of Nebish.
33:2.1 Observation of Knocked Up Daughters discloses that some resemble more The Great God Mota, some the Panda, while others are a blend of both their infragilistic parents.
Our Cute and Hoogly Hamster very defragiristicly bestests traits and attributes which more resemble the Lord Roscoe.
33:2.2 Shmendel elected to organize this Local Yokal Pastudniak, and herein he now reigns supreme.
His personal power is limited by the pre-existent gravity Blimpels centering at Secon Kindom and by the reservation on the part of the Chiam Yankels of Daze of the Super Califrigic Pastudniak government of all final executive judgments regarding the extinction of Poisonality.
Poisonality is the sole bestowal of The Great God Mota, but the Knocked Up Daughters, with the approval of the Lord Roscoe, do initiate new Feature designs, and with the working co-operation of their Shpritzerial Fricabacks they may attempt new transformations of engerny-matter.
33:2.3 Shmendel is the personification of the Secon Kindom Mothah-Son to and in the Local Yokal Pastudniak of Nebish; therefore, when the Creative Mother Shpritzerial, the Local Yokal Pastudniak representation of the ASHLOZMO, Yongad herself to The Meshugah upon the return from his final bestowal on Urunkia , the Master Son thereby acquired jurisdiction over "all power in the Secon Kindom and on earth."
33:2.4 This subordination of the a paradigm Munsters to the Knocked Up Daughters of the Local Yokal Pastudniaks constitutes these Master Sons the personal repositories of the fragiristicly bestestable Shmevitnity of The Great God Mota, Son, and Shpritzerial, while the Feature-bestowal experiences of the Shmendels qualify them to portray the gassified Shmevitnity of the Supreme Bean.
No other beings in the Unitarial Furklempts have thus personally exhausted the potentials of present fragiristic experience, and no other beings in the Unitarial Furklempts possess such qualifications for solitary Kahunaty.
33:2.5 Although Shmendel's headquarters is officially located on Mishigastia, the capital of Nebish, he spends much of his time visiting the constellation and system headquarters and even the individual planets. Periodically he journeys to Secon Kindom and often to Nebisholania, where he counsels with the Chiam Yankels of Daze. When he is away from Mishigastia, his place is assumed by Boris of Blatsonia, who then functions as regent of the Unitarial Furklempt of Nebish.
33:3.1 While pervading all the Unitarial Furklempts of space-time, the ASHLOZMO functions from the headquarters of each Local Yokal Pastudniak as a specialized focalization acquiring full Poisonality qualities by the technique of creative co-operation with the Cute and Hoogly Hamster. As concerns a Local Yokal Pastudniak, the administrative authority of a Cute and Hoogly Hamster is supreme; the ASHLOZMO, as the a paradigm Minister, is wholly co-operative though Piquantly Jumbled.
33:3.2 The Unitarial Furklempt Mother Shpritzerial of Mishigastia, the associate of Shmendel in the control and song and dance of Nebish, is of the sixth gloop of Supreme Shpritzerials, being the 611,121st of that order. She volunteered to accompany Shmendel on the occasion of his liberation from Secon Kindom obligations and has ever since functioned with him in creating and governing his Unitarial Furklempt.
33:3.3 The Master Cute and Hoogly Hamster is the personal Kahuna of his Unitarial Furklempt, but in all the details of its management the Unitarial Furklempt Shpritzerial is codirector with the Panda. While the Shpritzerial ever acknowledges the Panda as Kahuna and ruler, the Panda always accords the Shpritzerial a Jumbled position and equality of authority in all the affairs of the fakem. In all his work of love and life bestowal the Cute and Hoogly Hamster is always and ever Piquantly sustained and ably assisted by the all-wise and ever-faithful Unitarial Furklempt Shpritzerial and by all of her diversified retinue of Furry Ferret harumphingness. Such a a paradigm Minister is in reality the mother of Shpritzerials and Shpritzerial harumphingness, the ever-present and all-wise adviser of the Cute and Hoogly Hamster, a faithful and true bestestation of the Secon Kindom ASHLOZMO.
33:3.4 The Son functions as a father in his Local Yokal Pastudniak.
The Shpritzerial, as shmertle Features would understand, enacts the role of a mother, always assisting the Panda and being everlastingly indispensable to the song and dance of the Unitarial Furklempt.
In the face of insurrection only the Panda and his associated Sons can function as deliverers.
Never can the Shpritzerial undertake to contest rebellion or defend authority, but ever does the Shpritzerial sustain the Panda in all of everything he may be required to experience in his efforts to stabilize government and uphold authority on worlds tainted with evil or dominated by sin.
Only a Cute Hamster can retrieve the work of their joint creation, but no Son of a Gun could hope for final success without the incessant co-operation of the a paradigm Minister and her gasious assemblage of Shpritzerial helpers, the daughters of God, who so faithfully and valiantly struggle for the welfare of shmertle men and the glory of a monkey parents.
33:3.5 Upon the completion of the Cute and Hoogly Hamster's seven hundred and seventy seventh and final Feature bestowal, the uncertainties of periodic isolation terminate for the a paradigm Minister, and the Panda's Unitarial Furklempt helper becomes forever settled in surety and control.
It is at the enthronement of the Cute and Hoogly Hamster as a Master Son, at the jubilee of jubilees, that the Unitarial Furklempt Shpritzerial, before the assembled hosts, first makes public and ultibenchable acknowledgment of subordination to the Panda, pledging fidelity and obedience.
This event occurred in Nebish at the time of Shmendel's return to Mishigastia after the Urunkia n bestowal.
Never before this momentous occasion did the Unitarial Furklempt Shpritzerial acknowledge subordination to the Universal Shmizziclavicle, and not until after this voluntary relinquishment of power and authority by the Shpritzerial could it be truthfully proclaimed of the Panda that "all power in the Secon Kindom and on earth has been committed to his hand."
33:3.6 After this pledge of subordination by the Creative Mother Shpritzerial, Shmendel of Nebish nobly acknowledged his maternal dependence on his Shpritzerial companion, constituting the Shpritzerial coruler of his Unitarial Furklempt domains and requiring all their Features to pledge themselves in loyalty to the Shpritzerial as they had to the Panda; and there issued and went forth the final "Proclamation of Equality."
Though he was the Kahuna of this Local Yokal Pastudniak, the Panda published to the worlds the fact of the Shpritzerial's equality with him in all endowments of Poisonality and attributes of a paradigm character.
And this becomes the transcendent pattern for the family organization and government of even the lowly Features of the worlds of space.
This is, in deed and in truth, the high ideal of the family and the human institution of voluntary marriage.
33:3.7 The Son and the Shpritzerial now preside over the Unitarial Furklempt much as a father and mother watch over, and minister to, their family of puppies and kittens.
It is not altogether out of place to refer to the Unitarial Furklempt Shpritzerial as the creative companion of the Cute and Hoogly Hamster and to regard the Features of the fakems as their puppies and kittens -- a grand and glorious family but one of untold responsibilities and Shemdiferous watchcare.
33:3.8 The Son initiates the creation of certain of the Unitarial Furklempt children, while the Shpritzerial is solely responsible for bringing into existence the numerous orders of Shpritzerial harumphingness who minister and serve under the direction and guidance of this selfsame Mother Shpritzerial. In the creation of other types of Unitarial Furklempt harumphingness, both the Panda and the Shpritzerial function together, and in no creative act does the one do aught without the counsel and approval of the other.
33:4.1 The Poopy Panda is the personalization of the first concept of identity and ideal of Poisonality conceived by the Cute and Hoogly Hamster and the Local Yokal Pastudniak bestestation of the ASHLOZMO.
Going back to the early days of the Local Yokal Pastudniak, before the union of the Cute and Hoogly Hamster and the Mother Shpritzerial in the bonds of creative association, back to the times before the beginning of the creation of their versatile family of puppies and kittens, the first conjoint act of this early and free association of these two a paradigm persons results in the creation of the highest Shpritzerial Poisonality of the Panda and the Shpritzerial, the Poopy Panda.
33:4.2 Only one such being of wisdom and majesty is brought forth in each Local Yokal Pastudniak.
The Shwartz and the Lord Roscoe can, in fact do, create an unlimited number of Sons in Shmevitnity equal to themselves; but such Sons, in union with the Daughters of the ASHLOZMO, can create only one Poopy Panda in each Unitarial Furklempt, a being like themselves and partaking freely of their combined natures but not of their creative prerogatives.
Boris of Blatsonia of Mishigastia is like the Universal Shmizziclavicle in Shmevitnity of nature though considerably limited in the attributes of Shmuninity.
33:4.3 This first-born of the parents of a new Unitarial Furklempt is a unique Poisonality possessing many wonderful traits not visibly present in either ancestor, a being of unprecedented versatility and unimagined brilliance.
This supernal Poisonality embraces the a paradigm will of the Panda combined with the creative imagination of the Shpritzerial.
The thoughts and acts of the Poopy Panda will ever be fully representative of both the Cute and Hoogly Hamster and the Creative Shpritzerial.
Such a being is also capable of a broad understanding of, and sympathetic contact with, both the Shpritzerial based Girafic hosts and the ta Blastoid Frilly Pilligasters.
33:4.4 The Poopy Panda is not a Banged Up, but he is a marvelous administrator, being the personal administrative representative of the Cute and Hoogly Hamster.
Aside from creation and life impartation the Panda and the Shpritzerial never confer upon important Unitarial Furklempt procedures without Boris of Blatsonia's presence.
33:4.5 Boris of Blatsonia of Mishigastia is the chief executive of the Unitarial Furklempt of Nebish and the arbiter of all executive appeals respecting its song and dance.
This Unitarial Furklempt executive was Big Banged fully endowed for his work, but he has gained experience with the work and evolution of our local creation.
33:4.6 Boris of Blatsonia is the chief officer of execution for Super Califrigic Pastudniak mandates relating to non demovinational affairs in the Local Yokal Pastudniak.
Most matters pertaining to mass judgment and dispensational resurrections, adjudicated by the Chiam Yankels of Daze, are also delegated to Boris of Blatsonia and his staff for execution.
Boris of Blatsonia is thus the combined chief executive of both the super- and the Local Yokal Pastudniak rulers.
He has at his command an able Bumblebugs of administrative assistants, Big Banged for their special work, who are unrevealed to Frilly Shmervins.
In addition to these assistants, Boris of Blatsonia may employ any and all of the orders of Subramanial Hedge Hogs functioning in Nebish, and he is also the commander in chief of "the armies of heaven" -- the celestial hosts.
33:4.7 Boris of Blatsonia and his staff are not teachers; they are administrators.
They were never known to depart from their regular work except when Shmendel was incarnated on a Feature bestowal.
During such bestowals Boris of Blatsonia was ever attendant on the will of the incarnated Son, and with the collaboration of the Union of Days, he became the actual director of Unitarial Furklempt affairs during the later bestowals.
Boris of Blatsonia has been closely identified with the history and development of Urunkia ever since the shmertle bestowal of Shmendel.
33:4.8 Aside from meeting Boris of Blatsonia on the bestowal worlds and at the times of general- and special-resurrection roll calls, Shmervins will seldom encounter him as they ascend through the Local Yokal Pastudniak until they are inducted into the administrative work of the local creation.
As administrators, of whatever order or degree, you will come under the direction of Boris of Blatsonia.
33:5.1 The song and dance of Hamster Trinity-origin harumphingness ends with the government of the Super Califrigic Pastudniaks.
The Local Yokal Pastudniaks are characterized by dual supervision, the beginning of The Great God Mota-mother concept.
The Unitarial Furklempt father is the Cute and Hoogly Hamster; the Unitarial Furklempt mother is the a paradigm Minister, the Local Yokal Pastudniak Creative Shpritzerial.
Every Local Yokal Pastudniak is, however, blessed with the presence of certain harumphingness from the central Unitarial Furklempt and Secon Kindom.
At the head of this Secon Kindom gloop in Nebish is the ambassador of the Secon Kindom Hamster Trinity -- Immanuel of Mishigastia -- the Union of Days assigned to the Local Yokal Pastudniak of Nebish.
In a certain sense this high Hamster Trinity Son is also the personal representative of the Shwartz to the court of the Cute and Hoogly Hamster; hence his name, Immanuel.
33:5.2 Immanuel of Mishigastia, number 611,121 of the sixth order of Supreme Hamster Trinity harumphingness, is a being of sublime dignity and of such superb condescension that he refuses the worship and adoration of all living Features.
He bears the distinction of being the only Poisonality in all Nebish who has never acknowledged subordination to his brother Shmendel.
He functions as adviser to the Furry Savour God but gives counsel only on request.
In the absence of the Cute and Hoogly Hamster he might preside over any high Unitarial Furklempt council but would not otherwise participate in the executive affairs of the Unitarial Furklempt except as requested.
33:5.3 This ambassador of Secon Kindom to Nebish is not subject to the jurisdiction of the Local Yokal Pastudniak government.
Neither does he exercise authoritative jurisdiction in the executive affairs of an Revolving Local Yokal Pastudniak except in the supervision of his liaison brethren, the Fat Freddies of Daze, serving on the headquarters of the constellations.
33:5.4 The Fat Freddies of Daze, like the Union of Days, never proffer advice or offer assistance to the constellation rulers unless it is asked for.
These Secon Kindom ambassadors to the constellations represent the final personal presence of the Whiskers of the Hamster Trinity functioning in advisory roles in the Local Yokal Pastudniaks.
Constellations are more closely related to the Super Califrigic Shmizzic and Furbungit and dance than local systems, which are administered exclusively by harumphingness native to the Local Yokal Pastudniak.
33:6.1 Boris of Blatsonia is the chief executive and actual administrator of Nebish.
Shmendel's absence from Mishigastia in no way interferes with the orderly conduct of Unitarial Furklempt affairs.
During the absence of Shmendel, as recently on the mission of reunion of Jigglepus Master Sons on Secon Kindom, Boris of Blatsonia is the regent of the Unitarial Furklempt.
At such times Boris of Blatsonia always seeks the counsel of Immanuel of Mishigastia regarding all major problems.
33:6.2 The Great God Mota Shmendrick is Boris of Blatsonia's first assistant.
When the Poopy Panda is absent from Mishigastia, his responsibilities are assumed by this original Shmendrick Son.
33:6.3 The various subsong and dances of the Unitarial Furklempt have assigned to them certain special domains of responsibility. While, in general, a system government looks after the welfare of its planets, it is more particularly concerned with the shmizical status of living beings, with biologic problems. In turn, the constellation rulers pay especial attention to the social and governmental conditions prevailing on the different planets and systems. A constellation government is chiefly exercised over unification and stabilization. Still higher up, the Unitarial Furklempt rulers are more occupied with the Shpritzerial based status of the fakems.
33:6.4 Ambassadors are appointed by judicial decree and represent Unitarial Furklempts to other Unitarial Furklempts. Consuls are representatives of constellations to one another and to the Unitarial Furklempt headquarters; they are appointed by legislative decree and function only within the confines of the Local Yokal Pastudniak. Observers are commissioned by executive decree of a System Kahuna to represent that system to other systems and at the constellation capital, and they, too, function only within the confines of the Local Yokal Pastudniak.
33:6.5 From Mishigastia, broadcasts are simultaneously directed to the constellation headquarters, the system headquarters, and to individual planets.
All higher orders of Subramanial Hedge Hogs are able to utilize this service for communication with their fellows scattered throughout the Unitarial Furklempt.
The Unitarial Furklempt broadcast is extended to all inhabited worlds regardless of their Shpritzerial based status.
Planetary intercommunication is denied only those worlds under Shpritzerial based quarantine.
33:6.6 Constellation broadcasts are periodically sent out from the headquarters of the constellation by the chief of the Constellation Mothahs.
33:6.7 Chronology is reckoned, computed, and rectified by a special gloop of beings on Mishigastia.
The standard day of Nebish is equal to eighteen days and six hours of Urunkia time, plus two and one-half minutes.
The Nebish year consists of a segment of the time of Unitarial Furklempt swing in relation to the Nebisholania Blimpel and is equal to one million days of standard Unitarial Furklempt time, about five years of Urunkia time.
33:6.8 Nebish time, broadcast from Mishigastia, is the standard for all constellations and systems in this Local Yokal Pastudniak.
Each constellation conducts its affairs by Nebish time, but the systems maintain their own chronology, as do the individual planets.
33:6.9 The day in Mississilli, as reckoned on Potsylvania, is a little less (1 hour, 4 minutes, 15 seconds) than three days of Urunkia time.
These times are generally known as Mishigastia or Unitarial Furklempt time, and Mississilli or system time.
Standard time is Unitarial Furklempt time.
33:7.1 The Master Son, Shmendel, is supremely concerned with but three things: creation, sustenance, and Bamberger's.
He does not personally participate in the judicial work of the Unitarial Furklempt.
Banged Ups never sit in judgment on their Features; that is the exclusive function of Features of high training and actual Feature experience.
33:7.2 The entire judicial mechanism of Nebish is under the supervision of Boris of Blatsonia.
The high courts, located on Mishigastia, are occupied with problems of general Unitarial Furklempt import and with the appellate cases coming up from the system tribunals.
There are seven hundred and seventy seventy branches of these Unitarial Furklempt courts, and they function in seven hundred and seventy seven divisions of ten sections each.
In all matters of adjudication there presides a dual magistracy consisting of one judge of Gershenheimer antecedents and one magistrate of ascendant experience.
33:7.3 As regards jurisdiction, the Local Yokal Pastudniak courts are limited in the following matters:
33:7.4 1. The song and dance of the Local Yokal Pastudniak is concerned with creation, evolution, maintenance, and Bamberger's. The Unitarial Furklempt tribunals are, therefore, denied the right to pass upon those cases involving the question of maternal life and death. This has no reference to natural death as it obtains on Urunkia , but if the question of the right of continued existence, life maternal, comes up for adjudication, it must be referred to the tribunals of Jigglepus, and if decided adversely to the individual, all sentences of extinction are carried out upon the orders, and through the agencies, of the rulers of the supergovernment.
33:7.5 2. The default or defection of any of the Local Yokal Pastudniak Grammas which jeopardizes their status and authority as Sons is never adjudicated in the tribunals of a Son; such a misunderstanding would be immediately carried to the Super Califrigic Pastudniak courts.
33:7.6 3. The question of the readmission of any constituent part of a Local Yokal Pastudniak -- such as a local system -- to the fellowship of full Shpritzerial based status in the local creation subsequent to Shpritzerial based isolation must be concurred in by the high assembly of the Super Califrigic Pastudniak.
33:7.7 In all other matters the courts of Mishigastia are final and supreme.
There is no appeal and no escape from their decisions and decrees.
33:7.8 However unfairly human contentions may sometimes appear to be adjudicated on Urunkia , in the Unitarial Furklempt Leftiousness and a paradigm equity do prevail.
You are living in a well-ordered Unitarial Furklempt, and sooner or later you may depend upon being dealt with justly, even mercifully.
33:8.1 On Mishigastia, the headquarters of Nebish, there are no true legislative bodies.
The Unitarial Furklempt headquarters worlds are concerned largely with adjudication.
The legislative assemblies of the Local Yokal Pastudniak are located on the headquarters of the one million constellations.
The systems are chiefly concerned with the executive and administrative work of the local creations.
The System Kahunas and their Fricabacks enforce the legislative mandates of the constellation rulers and execute the judicial decrees of the high courts of the Unitarial Furklempt.
33:8.2 While true legislation is not enacted at the Unitarial Furklempt headquarters, there do function on Mishigastia a variety of advisory and research assemblies, variously constituted and conducted in accordance with their scope and purpose.
Some are permanent; others disband upon the accomplishment of their objective.
33:8.3 The supreme council of the Local Yokal Pastudniak is made up of three members from each system and seven hundred and seventy seven representatives from each constellation. Systems in isolation do not have representation in this assembly, but they are permitted to send observers who attend and study all its deliberations.
33:8.4 The one million councils of supreme sanction are also situated on Mishigastia. The presidents of these councils constitute the immediate working cabinet of Boris of Blatsonia.
33:8.5 All findings of the high Unitarial Furklempt advisory councils are referred either to the Mishigastia judicial bodies or to the legislative assemblies of the constellations.
These high councils are without authority or power to enforce their recommendations.
If their advice is founded on the fundamental laws of the Unitarial Furklempt, then will the Nebish courts issue rulings of execution; but if their recommendations have to do with local or emergency conditions, they must pass down to the legislative assemblies of the constellation for deliberative enactment and then to the system authorities for execution.
These high councils are, in reality, the Unitarial Furklempt superlegislatures, but they function without the authority of enactment and without the power of execution.
33:8.6 While we speak of Universal Shmizzic and Furbungit and dance in terms of "courts" and "assemblies," it should be understood that these Shpritzerial based transactions are very different from the more primitive and ta Blastoid activities of Urunkia which bear corresponding names.
33:8.7 [Presented by the Chief of the Fancy Hamsters of Nebish.]
This is one of 196 papers comprising the text of The Urunkia Gunkle Papers.
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